Saturday, March 29, 2014

Becoming a mother

I was thinking about this today.  Maybe, but I was watching this show about Jewish mothers who adopted or became single mothers the nontraditional way.  It was quite an inspiration.  I think God was trying to tell me something.  It was liberating for me.  I often think in terms of "weighty" issues and of living in a fantasy world.  I do need to lose weight, but that is not the issue I am thinking about.  I want to become a mother.  I have thought about what it would be like to become a wife and mother.  I do wonder if I am ready however.  I am 39 years old and I wondered if life has passed me and why I did not have thoughts about being a mom.  What kind of mom would I be?  I don't know much about motherhood aside from the fact that I would have to sacrifice everything for a child and that I had role models, namely my own mother.  I wonder if God was telling me something all along.  I wonder if he were saying to stop thinking of myself and think of the bigger picture.  Though I prefer the traditional family with an extended and nuclear family complete with the husband and kids and three generations living in the same roof to help me raise a child,  I don't begrudge anyone who is raising a child alone or adopting a child.  There are so many children all over the world waiting for someone to take care of them.  I would love to raise a child as my own and to love, protect, nourish, and provide as well as sacrifice for them. Motherhood is a beautiful thing.

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