Friday, October 18, 2013

Update on Mickey Rourke obsession

My mind tends to loop.  I know it is about the obsession with Mickey Rourke.  I don't know what to believe.  What if his ex-wife were telling the truth?  There is hope to the end of my obsession.  It doesn't seem to be that way, but prayer changes things and my situation.  As you can see, I have been obsessed with Mickey Rourke for the past few months now.  It has been hard to say the least to understand the obsession and to answer why I have an obsession with a "bad boy" so to speak. 

Well here it is.  It no longer matters.  It is vanity.  In the grand scheme of things, it is worthless.  My relationship with God is what matters.  How much does it affect my relationship with God?  Does it have any effect if at all?  Should I care?  Well to answer those questions, yes it does matter.  It does have some effect on my relationship with God because the thoughts about Mickey Rourke consume much of my thought life.  It is a distraction and not in a good way.

I have woken up as a result of these thoughts.  I spend the day thinking about it.  I feel like I am going crazy sometimes.  I am glad that I didn't feel like that today, but I know that it is idolatry.  I needed help and I'm not out of the woods yet.  I have no special sayings or musings today so I am just rambling about an issue in my life.

On some days I just don't have anything to reflect on.  I don't know how my mind works.  I wish I did so I could move on from this obsession.  I spend a lot of the day obsessing and that is not good.  Idolatry and idleness are not of God.  I am to serve God only and spend my days not being lazy,  but being productive.  I am not even sure how he would see me if I were to ever meet him.  Would he be nice or would he be rude to me?   I have read some rude things about him and they may actually be true, so why would I want to meet him.  I have read some good things about him, too.  The truth is, I don't know him.  Mickey Rourke is only an image.  He is a person.  We are not to worship or be obsessed about images or about the creation instead of the Creator.

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