Failing to Plan

Failing to plan means just that: failing to plan.  The truth is, I didn't have a set plan to lose the weight.  I was always fearful.  Fear is tormenting.  All of my plans seem to have come to naught.  I plan to eat this many calories per day because I was struggling to eat a certain amount of calories.  It seemed too unrealistic yet I wanted to lose weight.  I became obsessed with calorie counting but I didn't spend enough time eating foods that were good for me despite them either in a bowl waiting to be eaten or in a can just "sitting there" in a pantry.  I didn't eat well and I didn't take enough time to plan my meals.  I was fearful that I would change my mind.  I did what I feared the most.  Not only did I change my mind.  I changed my entire routine over and over and over again.  So basically I just quit and started binging.  I felt like there was nothing that I can do.  I wasn't accountable yet I was held accountable.  I have set unrealistic standards for myself and I ended up gaining most of my weight back anyways.  I would like to start over but I keep on doing that and I still did not lose any weight.  Not to mention also that I was overeating at the time.  I knew and felt that I was taking time to be proactive but I quit.  Winners don't quit and quitters don't win.  That is a motto I certainly don't want to have for myself or for my life.