OCD and learning a language

I have had so many dreams for myself.  I prayed about those dreams.  It seems as if reality gets in the way of things. In my dreams, I am a student who has traveled the world, particularly in Brazil.  The reason why Brazil is scary is the wildlife.  It was raining spiders at one point.  Yikes.  That was when I stopped wanting to go, much less wanting to learn Portuguese.  However, I still want to learn a foreign language like Spanish. Yesterday, I was watching a telenovela from Mexico and it took me back a few years.  I don't know why, but I recall that has happened.  I forgot.  I was impatient and suffered from obsessive compulsive disorder. The obsessive thoughts it seems, could have ruined my life but also me.  It hasn't but it hasn't been easy. Now I think it is time for me to learn Spanish and maybe another language.  My goal is to learn Spanish and become a polyglot.  I wish that I had that skill.