Confessing

I am confessing something hilarious to you but normal to me.  I have OCD and the thoughts about my crush are not a good one.  It may take away the fantasy that I have and cause bad feelings toward him or whoever else that I have connected to his life.  We have choices to make and I have decided to confess and try to let it go.  I confess that there are two actors who don't like each other and because of it I have a pain of anxiety in my stomach.  Normally, I would not care, but it comes back to the thoughts that I have about how men and women relate to one another.  It also comes back to chivalry and character.  Stuff like that makes me wonder what has happened to chivalry.  It is strange because it is from a long time ago and not now.  I really care little about the here and now, but the back then.  I have a crush on an older man from a movie.  I will never meet the guy or anything like that.  He knows me as much as I know him, truly.  I feel so silly about it, but I figure that exposing it will do wonders and so far it has.