I wonder though

I no longer have the doubts about being saved but I still wonder however.  I have no idea when I first became truly saved.  My guess is that I was first saved 20 years ago.  I followed and requested information from false prophets and teachers.  I wonder if that has something also to do with what I did earlier.  If I were truly saved then why this issue.  I was ruled by fear and I still am.  I have grown tired of getting my feelings hurt.  I have low self-esteem and I am self-conscious.  There are times when I feel like I was unworthy of God's love.  Maybe because of some things I didn't realize was wrong I fail to read the cues from other people.  Sometimes I feel lonely in this world.  I am tired of feeling like I am alone and walking on eggshells.  I don't know what to do and it is frustrating.  But no one has ever said that life is fair.

Jesus loves me and I have some doubts

I believe that the Lord Jesus loves me.  I called His name.  I believe that He rose Jesus Christ from the dead.  Jesus died for my sins.  There is no other name that can cleanse us from our sins.  Jesus did that for me, and I am grateful.  I had doubts that Jesus saved me, much less loved me.  He will forgive all manner of sins.  Because I did a bad thing, I had issues.  I felt horrible about what I did and I am sorry for what I have done.  I believe that my sin caused a lot of doubt because of my doubt. I needed God's help and to God, I am so sorry.  I needed to repent of my sins but I wonder if that is what I did.  I need God's help seeing sin as detestable.  I need help with those struggles that I have been going through.

No matter what I am going through.  I ask for the move of the Holy Spirit on my behalf.  I need wisdom in that I need Him to cleanse me from my unrighteousness.  All I had to  do is to call His name, for Jesus is Lord, and believe that the Father rose Him from the dead.  I wondered if I repented for the right reasons.  I wondered if I repented out of fear or out of love for God, which includes living for and serving God.  I wonder if I got saved for the wrong reasons and not because I love the Lord.  I want to love the Lord and be thankful what He has done for me.  I still wonder that.  I don't want to go by what others say or what they believe.  I feel like I have.  I do go by what others say or believe.  All I have to do is to read and study God's Word.  I need to feed myself with the Word and exercise my mind.  I realize that it is good for my brain which has done me well.  I have bipolar as well and I feel like sometimes I wonder if that is why I often feel so alone.

I am concerned that I am not saved

I don't think that I am truly saved. How do I become saved? I don't know what to do. I am posting here because I am not sure if I am saved or am I lost. It is quite scary and I am not sure I have enough faith to be saved. I also have obsessive thoughts and doubts about praying. What does it mean to call on Jesus and to be saved by faith in Jesus? I would like to be saved and live a holy life for the Lord. I wonder if the OCD has something to do with the thoughts? I am concerned that after all of these years, I am truly lost though I long for his salvation, but what if I am not raptured? I am worried. I pray to Jesus and call on His name as Lord, but I still have doubts. I have had these problems for years. I am a spiritual person but I am doubtful of being saved. How can I pray, read the Bible, and act as if I am born again if I don't know if I am saved? Help me to understand. How much of it is a spiritual issue and how much is it and OCD issue? My counselor has been very helpful in a lot of things but I need your advice.  Help me, Lord.

Pray for me and all others

I prayed for forgiveness.  I believe that the Lord has healed me.  However, there is an issue with wondering who is a true prophet of God and who is not.  I recall that I have followed false prophets and I am guilty of that.  False prophets do not care about the flock.  It is a shame and they are in need of repentance.  The end for these false prophets and their followers will not be good.  God will not know them when judgement happens and they will have a sad end.  I will pray for forgiveness and to separate myself from negative influences and ungodly activity.  I will live a holy, righteous life because that is what God requires of all of us who claim Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior.  We are holy, for God is holy.  And that too is a requirement.

Depression

I have done wrong today.  Right now, I feel like going crazy.  It has been that bad.  I feel like I am not worthy.  I am not perfect anyways.  I wish I could take back what I did.  I feel horrible.  I asked God for forgiveness but I feel depressed.  I know that something is wrong with me and I brought it on myself.

I did wrong

I feel so bad today.  I did something I should not have done.  I am reflecting and I am anxious still. Even though the event is over, I still feel like I haven't gotten away with it.  I am supposed to be a Christian, a believer in Christ.  Something is wrong with me and I brought it on myself.  I am guilty as charged.  Now how do make things right?

Ask, seek, and knock

I believe in a prayer for a desperate situation.  Right now I have been tired and depressed.  I was in a manic state this weekend.  The bipolar seems to kick in making my situation worse.  I am in a situation where I can't seem to get out of.  I feel that way because I am scared.  I am afraid and I have a hard time overcoming this.  I will keep on praying for the Bible says ask, seek, and knock.  I will not give up.